Oh, Carlos.

Art.
Life.
Whatever.

Despite being choc full of astronomically expensive outfits, sky-high Manolos and four glamazonian, sex-crazed ladies, the tragic woman exiting the theater in front of me—flabby ass, frumpy outfit and hideous fuzzy flip-flops—is a tangible metaphor for the shit show that was Sex and the City: The Movie.

I can’t believe I went to the mall at midnight for that.